10 Funniest New Year's Resolutions

DecMon 2009 Filed in: I'm a New Yorker! I Knew That

Who wants to hear the usual New Year’s resolutions? I mean how many of us actually stick to it? Kudos to anyone who has, but I thought it would be better to list the 10 funniest New Year’s resolutions acccording to Associatedcontent.com

10. I will make my husband happy and pretend to become a baseball fan.
I will get through this by secretly sending hate mail to Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez.
9. I will not congratulate any women on their pregnancy, unless I am absolutely sure she is indeed with child and didn't just gain some weight.
8. I will openly admit I am a fan of iCarly, and it isn't my daughter who insists on watching this tween comedy show;
however, it is I who beg her to watch with me.
7. I will not watch any more reality shows that involve twelve dysfunctional women, a rich bachelor and many bottles of whiskey. Why relive my twenties?
6. I will stop using the excuse that I am a very busy new mom; therefore, I can't shower often, especially since my daughter is now six.
5. I will abandon the phrases LOL and OMG once and for all.
4. I will only log into Facebook five or six times a day as opposed to my usual twenty to thirty times per day.
3. I will accept the fact that I will ever stick to my resolution I have had for the last ten years, that I will go on a diet.
To heck with it: I resolve to eat whatever I want, forever.
2. I will cut way down on my alcohol intake, like way down to only four cocktails per day.
1. I will stop writing drunken emails to ex-lovers at 3:00 AM after finishing off a bottle of wine alone.